“I like boring things” — Andy Warhol
It wouldn’t be shocking if talent shows within the Wellesley Public School system — in light of its recent censoring of dancing Trumps — soon go the way of bake sales. But assuming the administration doesn’t compound its recent decision at Fiske Elementary School, we’ve come up with some suggested safe and unoffensive acts that should keep your kids from setting off parents and principals now that school has started back up.
*Joy of Painting: Have your budding artists pull out an easel, slap some paint on the canvas, and let the audience watch the paint dry (avoid political colors such as blue and red). Pro Tip: Have the kids paint the wall, so that the audience can stare at the wall, too.
*Watch Grass Grow: Chia Pets can be had on Amazon for less than $20. Have your kids trot out a Chia Pet or two, water the seeds and let the audience hunker down as nature takes its course. Pro Tip: Chia is a flowering plant in the mint family, but close enough to grass to do the trick.
*Gather ’round: Have your kids and their friends sit cross-legged on the floor and form an Open Circle. Discuss…
*Bubble soccer match: Have the kids play a quick game of Bubble Soccer and show off their mad skillz from the safety and comfort of giant plastic bubbles. Pro Tip: No keeping score, but trophies for all.
Wellesley Public Schools Strategic Plan 2013-2019 — The Musical! Get kids’ and adults’ feet a-tapping and hands a-clapping by converting such segments of the plan as “Align Resources with Educational Needs” into Broadway-like tunes. Pro Tip: Come up with a touchy-feely-catchy 4-letter acronym to work into some of your numbers.
So, enjoy the shows, and don’t forget to bring a pillow!