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Mrs. Swellesley gets crafty with holiday cards

January 2, 2021 by Deborah Brown Leave a Comment

Holiday cards are a big thing in our house. We love to get them, especially the picture card variety that allows us to lay eyes on our friends and family from Wellesley and far beyond. Every year the kids seem ever more hearty and hale and another foot taller, as if fortified daily by six healthy meals, plus protein-rich snacks. Everyone’s smiling, the family pets are on their best sit-and-stay behavior, and parents look like they haven’t aged a day. The backgrounds never disappoint. Beautiful beach settings. Mountaintops, so very high. Somehow, nobody’s hair is ever blown about. We love holiday cards.

Wellesley holiday cards
Repurposed holiday cards. All that’s required for this project is a stack of holiday cards, a pair of scissors, a one-hole punch, and some thin ribbon.

We used to get almost exclusively picture cards, but as our cards cohort has gotten older, the pictures have done a slow fade. At some point, families either can’t get everyone in one place for a decent shot, or young adults rebel and refuse to be included. So far we’ve been able to capture on film our entire family cheesing it up at some point during the year. We plan to splash such an image on a holiday card for as long as our kids let us get away with it.

I’m the envy of my friends because my holiday card duties are nonexistent. Mr. Swellesley does it all, from organizing the picture to ordering the cards to mailing out the seasons greetings. He has an impressive assembly line system, and I have no idea how it works. Cards for me are all play and no work. I consider freedom from the sausage-making part of card magic one of my Christmas gifts from Mr. Swellesley.

Wellesley holiday cards
Holiday cards are too pretty to just toss after a cursory glance. These beauties live on for another season as gift tags.

I do have one yearly responsibility, entirely self-imposed, and a lot of fun. After the family has had a good amount of time to admire the cards, they get crafted into next year’s gift tags. All that’s required for this project, copied one year from some Pinterest prodigy, is a stack of holiday cards, a pair of scissors, a one-hole punch, and some thin ribbon.

Not all the holiday cards will make the jump from this year’s greetings to next year’s gift cards. There’s an audition process. To pass, the gift card must on one side bear a pretty picture or lovely words (canned, Hallmark-like sentiments only, please). The other side must be be blank, so that I may write my own, highly original holiday sentiments. No human body parts are permitted to survive from from holiday card over to repurposed gift tag. No kitty paws or happy dog tails will sneak in, either. As you can see, the audition process is rigorous. The easiest way for a card to achieve gift-tag glory is, of course, for it to arrive as one of those lovely cards from a box of 20.

Wellesley holiday cards
A card that featured a string of old-timey  bulbs will live on next year as a gift tag.
Wellesley holiday cards
The back of the gift tag must be blank. I don’t want any of my gift recipients to turn the tag over and see body parts of people they don’t know. My  signature and witty holiday sentiments are quite enough.

Once the audition process is complete, I take a one-hole punch to the top left-hand corner of the cut-out tag. From there, I add a thin ribbon. Done.

Making gift tags gives me a triple shot of holiday smug:

  1. I feel pleased as punch with myself when I make the tags—I’ve reused! Just as Sustainable Wellesley always says I should.
  2. When the holidays roll around the next year I’m delighted that my gift tags are ready to roll. That’s one more thing crossed off the list, an organization technique lifted straight from Santa.
  3. It’s fun to revisit last year’s cards. Believe it or not, even after a whole year I remember which tag came from which family’s card.

As the holiday season winds down, my wreath may still be on the door; we’re all still stepping on rogue pine needles; and I have a few returns to take care of. But by gum, my 2021 gift tags are done.


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Filed Under: Holidays, Humor

Linden Square, Wellesley
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Wellesley Dads: Something funny’s up on Brook Path this Father’s Day

June 21, 2020 by Bob Brown 2 Comments

Those painted kindness rocks are always a pleasant surprise whether found in the woods, at schools, or just out on the sidewalk.

Wellesley has showered the Class of 2020 with love, in lights, with banners, at the car parade.

And while all of these speak to Dads, this Father’s Day you should expect a little more. Like a temporary trail of Dad Jokes on Wellesley’s Brook Path, between Cameron Street (Hunnewell Elementary School) and Smith Street (Wellesley High School track), and if you needed more, at Pegan Cove in Natick. Word is these will only be there through Father’s Day, June 21.

Dreams do come true…like when you dreamt you wrote The Hobbit, but were only Tolkien in your sleep.*

dad jokes

*NOT original

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Filed Under: Humor

Page Waterman, Wellesley
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Solving Wellesley mailbox challenge: The Swellesley Stick?

January 18, 2020 by admin 4 Comments

A Swellesley Report reader, looking out for residents struggling with the new secure mailboxes in Wellesley and seeking to help The Swellesley Report sustain itself financially, has made a modest proposal:

This covers a lot of ground and three or four of your recent stories.

I went to the Grove St post office to mail letters at the “drive up” (and get out) box. In fact, the driver of the car in front of me was out. But he was parked very close to the curb and was having trouble moving around his open car door and the mailboxes. He appeared to also be having trouble figuring out where to put the letters. It was dark, and the slot is not really visible in the dark. I know the challenge. After a few more moments he got back in the car, letters in hand, and drove off.

From my car I managed to get one side of my letters in the slot, then pushed them in with a newspaper I had with me. (Who said newspapers are outdated?) Which leads to the new product idea.

The Swellesley Stick. About a foot long and in the general shape of a clothes pin. Place the letters in the jaws, extend to and into the slot, release using the squeeze handles, stay in the car and feel smart. The stick would be big enough to proudly show a Swellesley logo. The basic daytime model would be just that, the deluxe 24-hour model could have a small LED. But the best part, thanks to your recent story, is that it would be made from the wood of the recently deceased Hunnewell Tree. You will have to move fast to secure the logs. I guess the fallback would be the RDF’s Christmas trees. The Hunnewell PTO could be your marketing partner in the first case, the DPW in the fallback. And for the final story, the sticks could be produced by the person who recently carved a buck statue on the base of a damaged tree on Overbrook Drive.

swellesley stick
A bad artist’s depiction of possible Swellesley Stick design

 

If people will buy a pet rock, they’ll buy a Swellesley Stick. And it will give you one more story idea, along with the revenue.

A Swellesley reader.

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Filed Under: Business, Humor

Stretch Lab, Wellesley

Happy 15th birthday to us: The Year in Swellesley

January 2, 2020 by Bob Brown 1 Comment

Nothing ever happens in Wellesley. Except it does.

We’ve enjoyed another full year of sharing your stories, breaking news and watching it go viral, and weaving in our personal adventures.

Wellesley Town Hall
Wellesley Town Hall

 

With the Swellesley Jrs. aging out of the Wellesley Public School system, Mrs. Swellesley turned her attention to The Swellesley Report as her full-time job. Our goal for 2020, our 16th year publishing, is to have Mr. Swellesley do the same.

Thank you to everyone who sent news tips and financial contributions to Swellesley in what has by far been our top year for readership and reader support. And huge thanks to all of our advertisers, who help to make Swellesley possible from a financial standpoint.

Swellesley highlights this year included:

  • The silly but sensational tale of people swiping the Old Town Road signs in Wellesley, and the town deciding to stop replacing them until singer Lil Nas X fever dies down. Yes, this went viral, with everyone from CNN to the New York Times picking it up from here.
    Old Town Road
    Old Town Road sign (Google Maps)

     

  • Answering your questions about stinky streets, harder-to-use mailboxes, EEE mosquito spraying, measles, an abandoned $6.5M home, political signs, and Truly Yogurt’s change in ownership.
  • The opening of the Boston Sports Institute, which generated one of the year’s feel-good stories–the introduction of sled hockey to town. Plus lots of new or refurbished sports fields in town, big upgrades on the way for the softball fields, and a brand new boardwalk with a vernal pool view.
Wellesley boardwalk
Wellesley Ecocampers make use of the vernal pool overlook.

 

  • The ongoing school building plans, town hall renovations,  possible Wellesley Square re-imagining, possible changes at Morses Pond, and all those housing developments. Plus the comings and goings of Wellesley town officials, including Wellesley Public Schools’ hiring of its first diversity director. Not to mention, Wellesley now has a Unified Plan.
  • The Wellesley Veterans’ Parade, fireworks and other Wellesley’s Wonderful Weekend activities.
  • Celebrating residents’ accomplishments in academics, the arts, business and sports. We tracked police and firefighter activity (including a fire at Hunnewell Elementary School). We helped to get the word out about community events and charitable endeavors. We mourned the loss of residents we loved or knew of and respected.
  • The ins and outs for local businesses, with White’s Bakery,  Loyal Companion and The Shade Store among newcomers, and Upper Crust, Village Market and Florijn among those leaving.
  • More automation coming to town, including at Roche Bros. in the form of self-checkout lanes, and at Wellesley Free Library in the form of an automated book handling system. Town Meeting members even voted electronically the last time around. Based on what we saw at the excellent, every-other-year STEM Expo, more automation is on the way.
  • Entertainment news, from a Wellesley resident being chosen to appear on “The Bachelor “TV show and to the release of “Knives Out,” a movie shot in part in Wellesley in 2108. And watch out Elton John.
lynne smith elton john
Lynne Smith: Wellesley’s Rocket Woman

 

  • Babson College scoring a $50M donation, and moving its giant renovated globe to a new park as part of the school’s centennial celebration. Anita Hill spoke at Wellesley College.
  • Bowing down to 2019 WHS seniors for pulling off a brilliant year-end prank designed to grab attention but not land anyone in jail or off a college’s acceptance list.
wellesley high senior tailgate
WHS surprise tailgate

 

  • We enjoyed the general weirdness and wonderfulness around here, from a reed pump organ being left at the Wellesley dump to the Thanksgiving Day football game skirmish that grabbed more attention than the Raiders’ strong season to a unique buck carving from a diseased tree on a residential lot.
organ wellesley
Estey organ left at Wellesley RDF (photo courtesy of Hilary Prus)

 

Wood carving, Overbrook Dr., Wellesley

 

On a more personal note:

  • Mr. and Mrs. Swellesley followed their true calling as supermodels for a Wellesley Free Library photo exhibit.
Wellesley Wednesdays, Beth Shedd
The Swellesleys made the cut for Beth Shedd’s Wellesley Wednesdays by Beth Shedd

 

  • Mr. Swellesley and one of the Swellesley Jrs. educated and entertained throngs of students with their yo-yo spectacular at Wellesley High Seminar Day.
  • Things got tense after Mr. Swellesley mistakenly brought library books to the dump.
  • Mrs. Swellesley spoke or held court at locations including the Council on Aging.
  • We were fortunate to have intern Lara Smith contributing throughout the summer.
  • Mr. Swellesley showed his artistic side with an exclusive Pollen Art Exhibit.
  • Mr. and Mrs. Swellesley melded minds with fellow independent online news publishers at a conference in Nashville, where the Grand Ole Opry gave us a shout-out.
  • Mr. Swellesley survived a flying shovel.
  • Mrs. Swellesley listened to her inner Marie Kondo, and our kitchen will never be the same (for a few months).
  • Beyond Wellesley, we took you to Boston Calling, the Woods Hole Film Festival, and more.

We finished the year by ringing the Salvation Army bells in Linden Square to help raise funds for local initiatives. We saw dozens of people we knew during our shift, and thanked many we didn’t know, but they all reminded us of the magical stuff we have here.

elsa in wellesley square

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Filed Under: Beyond Wellesley, Books, Dump, Education, Houses, Humor, Kids, Media, Outdoors, Sports, Technology, Town Meeting, Uncategorized

Wellesley’s own Elizabeth Suneby to read from her new picture book, “No Room For a Pup!”

December 14, 2019 by Deborah Brown Leave a Comment

Elizabeth Suneby, Wellesley
EJ the pup.

When Mia’s mom says there’s no room for a pup in their apartment, she really, really means it. Mia doesn’t understand. It’s not like she’s asking for an elephant. When mom gets multiple-teamed by Mia, the neighbors, her book-club ladies, and even her own mother it seems resistance may be futile.

Author and Wellesley resident Elizabeth Suneby dedicated her new book, No Room for a Pup!, to her own precious pup EJ, who sadly passed away on Oct. 30 at 15 3/4 years old.

Suneby will read her book at Wellesley Free Library’s Children’s Room on Saturday, Dec. 21 at 10am.

 

 

Liz Suneby, Wellesley

 

 

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Filed Under: Animals, Books, Entertainment, Humor, Kids, Wellesley Free Library

Catch & release: Mr. Swellesley’s fishiest run yet

August 17, 2019 by Bob Brown 5 Comments

First, thoughts and prayers to anyone who saw me running shirtless on Saturday morning. But really, I had a good excuse.

I got up before 6am to log an 11-mile run, part of my training for a half marathon in October. I would have preferred to get up a little later considering I’m up before sunrise most week days, but this was a special day: Our youngest child was heading off to college for his freshman year, and he wanted to get going by 8:30am. So rise early I did.

Once I got going I didn’t mind. The run would give me a chance to finalize in my head some words of wisdom to torture my son with on our drive to his college drop-off.

I also congratulated myself for remembering to use insect repellent, anticipating that bugs would be on the attack on this humid morning. Indeed, I pretty much held off the deer flies, mosquitoes and other biting pests.

But then a little past the 8-mile mark near Babson College’s new athletics and recreation facility, I felt a sharp pain near my left shoulder, on my upper arm. I suspected an insect had snuck under my sweaty shirt and was going to town on me. I whacked the spot a couple of times and then realized I was hitting something hard. What the heck?

I pulled off to the side (something I try never to do on my runs) and discovered the source of my pain: a fishing lure set with 2 treble hooks.

fish hook

I really didn’t think I’d ever outdo this past winter’s flying shovel running incident (Groundbreaking Wellesley story: Flying shovel hit me while I was running). But I think this qualifies.

This is no fish story

fishing lure
The lure, the shirt

 

I still don’t know how the lure clung to me. My first thought was that it must have been hanging from a tree that I brushed against. Or maybe less dramatically, we had one in our house that got mixed up in the laundry.

However it got there, it got me. As I struggled to dislodge it from my shirt and myself, the hooks dug in. The next thing I knew, a fellow runner (I regrettably failed to get her name) saw me struggling and asked if I needed help.

Self-described as “not mechanical at all,” and confirming that she was “far from being a doctor,” the woman went to work, apologizing if she ripped my shirt. Struggling to free the lure, she tentatively asked if I’d take my shirt off, to give her a better angle at the barbs. Unfortunately, one of her pulls extricated a hook from my shirt and into one of her fingers. After she freed herself from the hook, she tried a bit longer to help me and then suggested I might want to go to the doctor.

Instead, I wrapped the shirt around my left humerus like a tourniquet and ran as fast as I could for the last 3 miles. That consisted of a route mainly on the Sudbury Aqueduct, past the dump and back to my starting spot near Wellesley College.

I arrived home just at 8:30am, apologizing to Mrs. Swellesley and Swellesley Jr., for my late arrival (and being reminded of the time I got stuck on the Charles River without a paddle on an inflatable raft when I was supposed to be getting home for my niece or nephew’s christening…).

And oh yeah, can you help me get this fish hook out of my arm?

surgery wellesley
Pre-med?

 

My son, a former camp counselor with some basic medical training, switched from final packing mode to surgery mode. We headed to the downstairs bathroom, where the lighting is ER-quality. Mrs. Swellesley sterilized instruments and Swellesley Jr. cut my shirt off. After 5-10 minutes, he plucked the lure from my arm with little blood or screaming from either of us.

The affair provided one last boost of confidence to my son upon heading to college. “At least I’ve got a conversation starter,” he said, knowing he’s sure to be in for a week full of ice-breakers.

Glad I could help.

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Filed Under: Health, Humor, Outdoors, Parenting

Geese take over Severance Hill at Wellesley College…or do they?

April 25, 2019 by Deborah Brown 1 Comment

Severance Hill is legendary on the campus of Wellesley College. When it snows, students and townies alike use the steep slope for sledding. On a sturdy lower branch of the hill’s ancient oak tree, a swing usually appears in late spring. The Canada Geese currently grazing smack dab in the middle of the hill, however, are new.

I did a double take as I walked across campus. From a distance, the geese looked bona fide, but something was off. I’ve seen plenty of Canada Geese around the Wellesley College campus, but they’re usually either on Lake Waban or worn by fashion-conscious students sporting a winter coat label. These Severance Hill geese were different. A closer inspection revealed that the dozen waterfowl weren’t made of feathers and goose fat. These were changelings, handcrafted out of wood and painstakingly painted.

Canada geese, Wellesley College
Wellesley College seniors took part in a little fowl play last night on Severance Hill.

I asked a couple of passing students what it was all about. “I think it’s part of a senior thesis project,” said one. Oh. An art installation. Well, that would be laudable, I thought, but wouldn’t it be more fun if it were an end-of-year prank?

The front-desk staff at the Davis Museum cleared things up for me, and all it took was a quick look at a dorm’s Instagram account. There, a bold group claimed credit saying, “We ventured to Sev Green in an act of unity to prank Tower Court in the most epic of epic pranks…I hope you look up and smile as you are reminded of our time together.”

Well played, Wellesley College Class of 2019. You totally had me fooled.

Wonder what the Wellesley High School seniors will come up with this year.

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Filed Under: Humor, Wellesley College

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January 26 @ 6:00 pm - 7:00 pm
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